I'm rolling into the two year anniversary of moving to Louisiana, and for the most part I have resigned myself to the fact that I live there now. My husband is not looking for other employment opportunities, and 2/3 of my children prefer to continue their educations there. I have friends, and I have a job (if I wish to continue it).
I live there, but it's not my home.
I've probably traveled back to North Carolina about a dozen times since I moved away, and upon my 2nd or 3rd trip back, I realized something that is solidifying with each additional visit:
This is not my home, either.
I don't feel like I belong in either place.
That's a disconcerting feeling- discovering that you don't feel at home in either of the places where you've lived for the past 30+ years.
So if I don't belong here or there, where do I belong?
I am not without a home, but I feel homeless.